gelotine and tsa

tea section of a groceries store::

gelo: babe, ano ning tsa moe mile?
raen: ano na man? wala ko sina kakilala.
gelo: ara bala ng tea o.
raen: fisti, chamomile you mean?

loveohlove.

of summer afternoons

Is this simply the unique perversity of the human heart that wants (and wants and wants) what it doesn't have -- Italian food in Paris, American jazz in Saint-Germain -- and, only when it is about to lose it, returns to the things that drew it to the desire in the first place? Or was there a kind of peace in it too? Loss, like distance, gives permission for romance. In a better-ordered Verona, Romeo and Juliet would have grown up to be just another couple at dinner.

Adam Gopnik, Paris to the Moon.

--
i don't feel like the quote or maybe on some percentage i do.


hey you.
yes you.

--

i badly wanted to see my nephew.

happy birthday dichee. and happy labor day to the manggagawang pinoy. :) am proud to say that i am a part of the work sector. and doing a laborious (spellcheck) job of staying up the whole night for 4 years now. oh yeah!
--
gelo woke up in tears this afternoon. my guy is such a boy.

--
i made chicken with tomato sauce. it's terrible.

each to each

"It's just ... I don't always say what I feel."
"Why not?"
"Because the truth sometimes hurts," I said.
"Yeah," he said. "So do lies, though."

Just Listen- Sarah Dessen

tonight, whilst walking hand in hand going to work, i burst out with: it would've been lonely without you around..

that's the first statement i made with utmost sincerity since last month's training. i realized that things would be easier if i loved w/out expectations. and true enough, love begets love. (and more. bwahaha.)

there are people from last year and people whom you'd meet that would at times make you think twice of the relationship that you are in at the moment. and then again, it will always boil down to the person whom you feel safest with and whose arms are your home.

murag 10 months nami ugma. i think. hahaha. lovelove.

i made lunch today. we've been surviving on bacon. aiwan kow. but, it's one common thread that would string us tahgether. :)

on other things:
i want my noodle legs back but, am okay with bod now that i have filled them in/up. i have tits and booty. haha. with belly. if i had long brown curly hair and huge sloe eyes, then i would have been latina. haha. but, i am okay with being insikoy. bottomline with regard to weight-gain:: the more the merrier!

may trainees ko na murag kulang sa bulan. yesterday i caved in and gave a long lecture about manners and being interested in work. to thunk most of them are older than i am. hayness.

happy tuesday!

dyosa, kamama, duende, gnomes,spartan

:)
still last weekend.
what love!

Whenever he was near her he could feel it, as if it were a live, animated thing, this acute awareness that she was the other half of him - a side that had been lost or perhaps had never existed until he found her. Daniel and the Angel -Jill Barnett

pata-an falls ma-ao

4/26 til 4/27
with team spartans
ma-ao, bago city,negros occidental

only happy when it rains

There are two reasons, then, for being content with whatever happens to you. The first is that it was meant just for you, prescribed for you, and preserved for you like a thread woven into your destiny from the very beginning. The second is that whatever happens to the individual contributes to the health, wholeness, and survival of the entire universe. You destroy the symmetry and continuity of the whole if you cut away even one part or remove a single cause. And that's what you do, to the extent you're able, every time you whine and complain - mutilate the whole by amputating the parts.

- Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

 

Trulala eklavu ang quote above.

 

I had a promising weekend with Gelo despite the fact that I wasn’t entirely up for the challenge of waking up 24 hours just so I could join his team building. I had a fun Friday class, then Saturday, I was a reluctant camper who joined gelo and his team for an hour bus ride to pata-an falls in ma-ao, a municipality near bago city. I hated bus rides and traveling in general because I had to hold my pee in most times. It’s hasslefeck.

During the trip I failed to see how pretty the landscape is, however when we got back home Sunday, I saw how lush everything around us is. There’s even a huuuuuuuuuuge mansion in the middle of nowhere. Already in its dilapidated state, makes me wonder how anyone can be that wealthy in the time of Spanish conquistadors.

 

I managed to take a dip in the waterfalls’ pool with leomore and jules cuz gelo was drunk the whole day, and during their team building activity, he was complaining about a whole lotta things. He was as cute as he can be, but, I wanted to throw him to the nearby rivers so he can sober up.

 

His team had soooo much videoke and drinking and food! Food excites me a whole lot cuz they even had lechon.

Then they were nice enuf to let us have one room to ourselves. Just me an gelo, attic room 3.  We did not have to cramp our selves on the mattresses.

 
Second day was climb climb up sunshine mountain day. Took one million pictures. Then boozing, then we’d gone home.

It was raining when we got home. In the middle of the night, I woke up, scared of the drippety-droppy sound of the rain, then I realized Gelo was right next to me. I was left feeling relieved and happy to find myself home with him. (lol-exag:)

 

Tah-day, made breakfast, he mopped and swept the whole house, I did some of the laundry, and we had groceries shopping, tas kfc late lunch, then date at taters.

 
It’s a happy Monday. God is living. That’s why I am also alive.

 

class

work lurve

:> lovelove

palmas del mar. april 19, 2008

tah-night!

self love.

the beach

4/19/2008

this.

"There is a feeling that I had Friday night after the homecoming game that I don ‘t know if I will ever be able to describe except to say that it is warm. Sam and Patrick drove me to the party that night, and I sat in the middle of Sam’s pickup truck. Sam loves her pickup truck because I think it reminds her of her dad. The feeling I had happened when Sam told Patrick to find a station on the radio. And he kept getting commercials. And commercials. And a really bad song about love that had the word “baby” in it. And then more commercials. And finally he found this really amazing song about this boy, and we all got quiet.

Sam tapped her hand on the steering wheel. Patrick held his hand outside the car and made air waves. And I just sat between them. After the song finished, I said something.

“I feel infinite.”

And Sam and Patrick looked at me like I said the greatest thing they ever heard. Because the song was that great and because we all really paid attention to it. Five minutes of a lifetime were truly spent, and we felt young in a good way. I have since bought the record, and I would tell you what it was, but truthfully, it’s not the same unless you're driving to your first real party, and you're sitting in the middle of a pickup with two nice people when it starts to rain.”

Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

--
i wish i had more time to spend on reading books, and one book i wanna find myself reading this month should be the Bible cuz i hadn't had time to read it since Bacolod. and i've been missing church, in my two years here, i hadn't found a church. and i think gelo is okay with tagging along with me should i find my church.

quote above just made me came to an awareness that i badly needed the company of good friends as well. i miss steff and joey. :(

--
gelo's folks wants us to move to their place mid-summer. i told him am not going anywhere with him unless we are married. i think that is fair enough. i wanted my own place. i am not keen on having so many people around me. i am okay with sharing and dealing with people every so often, it's just that i am okay if i were alone too. it's always better that way.

there are some things in a relationship that i still do not understand. and maybe i won't ever understand all of them things.
--

gelo's team building tomorrow. i honestly do not want to go. :( i went with him and some of his teammates to get booze in sm and gaisano. about 2k's worth of booze. grovers. these guys will die alcoholic.

btw

How can I keep my soul in me, so that
it doesn't touch your soul? - rilke

hayers. lisod palayo sa uban taw. :(

it's only thursday. long week. i have a feeling that this month will be loooooooong.
i'm not sure whether i am pmsing or just plainly acting up each time i'm with angelo. today, i wound up weeping every single time that i talk to him. over OA. grover ka exag na OA. i might even cry if we still eat processed food.

on tea: csareta told me i should get the berries tea from bob's- it's love gyud diay. then i realized i have almost a box of tea left rotting at home. i have black tea/ strawberry tea/ lavender tea/ chamomile- all ruined because of improper storage when gelo and i moved apartment. sayang. i love tea.

gawd, at least i talked about one happy thing today.

and what i love about being in tp is the fact that some people have relatives working in the states, and they usually bring tons of stuff from US to PI, my co-workers would then resell those, at supah marked up price pero a hell lot cheaper than mall prices. so tah-day i got me a victoria's secret super sexxy hot mist. :) and gelo is paying for it. haha.

there are days when you are just sooo tired of trying to meet expectations and trying to measure up and all you wanted to do is cry.. sighs..

weekend, vacay with gelo, some falls somewhere. (team building)..

--
(how i happen to feel now. haha. sooooo high school:)
I'll admit it. I've always been more than a little proud of myself for having been fourteen and deeply benighted about almost everything, but having had the sense to recongnize what is surely a universal truth: Jimmy Stewart is always and indisputably the best man in the world, unless Cary Grant should happen to show up.

We talked and talked and talked. Maybe love comes in at the eyes, but not nearly as much as it comes in at the ears, at least in my experience. As we talked, lights flicked on inside my head; by the end of the night, I was a planetarium.

--Love Walked In by Marisa de los Santos

1000

'For you, a thousand times over.' (Khaled Hosseini's The Kite Runner)

maybe i am stuck in that mode every time things get messed up at home. maybe gelo is right; we are already a family. that's why each time there's something wrong, we wind up saying sorry, then move on. pero sabagay, if our pettiness reaches a thousand times na guro, then one of us may say undangan na ang delirio cuz it's kyepoi na.

shobe has a job. thank you Lord. paano nalang ang baby dotdot nya if ever she doesn't have it?

if i had a boy i'd name him mika as gelo wanted it to be. but, i'd also want khalil, and am sure gelo wouldn't want his boy named khalil. divah, cuteness, i'll call the boy lilo, lily, khalilhilo, kahililo? hehe.

i've a new pet name for angelo, it's langka. cuz he barely calls me langga anymore, to get even, i'll call him langka, which in ilonggo, pretty much means jackfruit or blank(blank like stupid kinda blank)..

i hate our apartment. i hate the empty spaces and the long walk to the sakayan ng trisikel. argh.

i drink about 2-3 litres of water per shift. grabeh. i realise i love water more than anything else. i love pepsi as well. hehe.

one thing i like about being in training is to be able to help my cotrainer out. one or a couple of them trainers are as lost as i were when i started out. maybe they can identify with me dut's why they go and ask me. :) haha.

sm with gelo today. i had to buy a thank you gift for shana, then forgot it at home when i got to work. hayers.

girl,

i've had about 3 hours of sleep today. when gelo got home, we decided against making lunch cuz we were both too tired and had to go to the bbq nook near our place and in many months i had the courage to eat chicken intestines again. pinoy street food is ♥.

i am cranky and tired and all swollen and still has these one gazillion tiny bruises all over my body. hayers.

his ma wants us married, my ma wants us married, we both want ourselves married one day, prolly we will get married but, to other people. ha-ha!

he is a boy and i think there are things that he'd look at as a priority and i would look at them like they were plain silly-ness. or perhaps, i am the one who is being silly when he explains his priorities.

gawd, lately we've been arguing soooo much about the tiniest life things it doesn't bother me whether he wins or i win. as long as i just get to yell, raise my voice, or punch him. whatever works. and then i'd wind up crying and saying i am sorry. like duh.. oh well, anyway my goal is to become gretchen.

--
i also stayed up abit too late because i thought i'd be helping another trainer whose starting a new class, then johnny pulled me aside and had to talk. okay, i heart johnny even if he gets to me at times. he is an okay guy. like jeremy who bosses around at times, then i realize that he really is my boss and at the same time my friend. so it's fine.

people are just amazing and at the same time funny. and our hearts are sometimes just mad. mad about life, work, passions, beliefs, and principles. (as shana was saying we evangelize wut we believe in, not necessarily our religion but, it can be anything that we truly believe in.) and the heart makes us the oddest/ unique-est ones out there. right now, my heart is a baaaaaaad as it can be. but, i now He is wringing it out so that i can make it mad about the right things.

--
"I'm glad it's a girl. And I hope she'll be a fool--that's the best thing a girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool."

fitzgerald.

*̡͌l̡̡̡ ̡͌l̡*̡̡ ̴̡ı̴̴̡ ̡̡͡|̲̲̲͡͡͡ ̲▫̲͡ ̲̲̲͡͡π̲̲͡͡ ̲̲͡▫̲̲͡͡ ̲|̡̡̡ ̡ ̴̡ı̴̡̡ destination gretchen barretto

if everyone else's destination would be boracay, bora bora french polynesia, and the maldives, mine is simple. to be la greta with a white jaguar. :)

city songs

my shift started at 6pm and will later end at 7am. gahd. i wish i were born wealthy. we had shana (our network training manager) teach us a 2 hour session about great customer service patterned after disney's philosopy. i left the training session feeling a whole lot better about my job until i saw the ops floor, most of my agents were absent, 2 sups are almost gone. aaaaaaaaaaaaah.

gelo's not at work tonight. rest day. and everyone else is on their rest day. but, at least this would give me time to enjoy the evening alone.

life is fair. hayers. this will be a long week, i imagine.

"What I recognized was the way they kept looking at each other even though they were each talking to a boy. Every so often they exchanged these quick, knowing glances, each making sure the other one was still there, still with her. I wondered how long their friendship would last, and I felt sorry for them, because they didn't know it wouldn't."
~ The Myth of You & Me, Leah Stewart

fan boy

btw, dut 15 minute is worth the whole day's wait.

i am a walking contradiction for writing this entry. but, i am a girl and i haven't made up my flakey mind yet..

exhibit # 1: raen ahay wla kna di sa monday?
#2: Hi sweetie.. hehehe.. yogs ka subu la na d gahod!
#3: Hi switie... im BACK! hehehe
#4: ok lunchy at 2am... hehehe sked q gid man for lunch na=)
#5: ahaaayyyy ah... kasabad ga sturya pa ta gni pro.hehehe

ilonggo fanboys are soooo french..but, gelo will truly strangle me..

st. tropez sun

saturday:: i did not know i will be attached to my last class. despite the fact that i have a ♥-hate relationship with them. and i never had the chance to really get to know everyone else from that class. all i know is that they're not a rotten bunch and they'd do well on the floor.. i did not know that if ever things will boil down to something as shitty as termination from the job, i'd wind up sticking it with them. odd. after training last friday, i ended up crying when one supervisor came to me and told me she was sacked for some reason. i want to be levelheaded when it comes to work policies, this way i would not feel bad when these things would ever ever happen again.
♥
i am not exactly sun burnt as i hope i would be. nonetheless,we got to soak up the summer sun for a few hours right after my friday shift at palmas del mar.. they have mahal everything.. from mango smoothies, to halo halo, to their cottages, they're pricey. i love how gelo and i are when we are alone and noone is watching, and when we are okay with each other's company. he is more gwapo than any other fan boys, oh well, he knows that. at times i feel like my love for him is no longer operable and yet, last saturday disproved it.
♥
tahday is groceries day. laundry day. wifey day. haha.

enjoy nicky hilton and her pink and black flats. (from omg)
♥
raeyna

boy-craziness

ahgahd. am honestly crushing on one of the comm coaches of our account.

and he attended my class for the comm coach session. supah kilig! i've never been in this kilig mode for the longest time.

gelo would kill me if he finds out. haha.

--
if only it would be possible to be at two places at the same time. hayers.
i hate it that breaks are shorter than lunches.

i wonder what brought me to this predicament. i was never born a cheat.

The Quarter Life

In the burned house I am eating breakfast.
You understand: there is no house, there is no breakfast,
yet here I am.
--Margaret Atwood, Morning in the Burned House

 

            ♥ On some days the above quote made sense. Would anyone know the symptoms of quarter-life crisis? Cuz I think I have it. Or maybe I have manic elation and manic depression. Haha. Gelo was asking me about babies and children and what are the odds that we aren’t getting any. I told him tons. Now, I am scared of children and of marriage. And those things. They have this huge permanence. And I do not care for permanence and consistency anymore. It’s odd how you realize when you grow up; you become a person who is only for yourself.. Lately, it felt like such.

 

 

And on the happier scheme of things.. it’s payday! Haha. Gelo got me a pair of white pekpek shorts from guess. I could’ve died for the denim ones that posh would wear but, my legs aren’t beckham thin. They look like huge portions of hams! I lack sleep. I wanna strangle some of the trainees. I promise there will be attrition in this wave.

 

Leaving with a girly quote::

 

“We could never understand why the girls cared so much about being mature, or why they felt compelled to compliment each other, but sometimes, after one of us had read a long portion of the diary out loud, we had to fight back the urge to hug one another or tell each other how pretty we were. We felt the imprisonment of being a girl, the way it made your mind active and dreamy, and how you ended up knowing which colors went together. We knew that the girls were our twins, that we all existed in space like animals with identical skins, and that they knew everything about us though we couldn't fathom them at all. We knew, finally, that the girls were really women in disguise, that they understood love and even death, and that our job was merely to create the noise that seemed to fascinate them."


The Virgin Suicides, by Jeffrey Eugenides

 

Happy weekend!

 

ako-a maestra look.

char oi. i want to be more corporate instead of plain frilly/girly.

portrait of a teacher. haha.

One thing I like about training is the fact that every day is different. It’s dynamic. Even if I had to teach the same thing per class, there’s always something new that would come up. When I miss teaching something from a previous class, I could go ahead and make up for it in another class and be better at it. There’s always room for betterment and yeah, more rooms for me to test my patience, specifically when there are gals in class who act as if this is high school and they’re entitled to act like filthy rich brats.

 

I’m happy to be doing what I am doing. I may be tired and would’ve zero energy to do things I used to do (zero in on partying, checking my mails, smsing, shopping-I’ve less money now :) and I’ve been skipping church and yoga yet, I am left grateful cuz my job is honestly fulfilling, at most during my training class’ graduation and when I see them doing just fine on the phones, save the ones who are pasaway. :)

 

Terribly happy today! I wanted to hug a tree. Haha.

 

This afternoon, I woke up, did some housekeeping and then gelo and I made lunch. Lil things like these can be fun diay.

 

God is always great.

 

"I want to conduct each day of my life in the best possible way.... And I should value the kindness that others bestow upon me. And if someone should treat me with cruelty, I should receive them. For, perhaps, they are in worse pain than me"

From the play Conduct of Life
by Maria Irene Forbes

 

*oh well, may days na dili ni possible ang above quote. Haha.

 

miyerkules

gelo is the typical jealous boyfriend and at times when he is at it, i wanted to strangle him and then gag him til he cannot breathe then trash his body at the pond on our backyard. haha.
gago gyud. but, he is still adorable so carry pa.

--

gawd. am working. i wish there'll come a time when i can take a sabbatical.

i call the guys from the backrow in class backstreet boys. insik guys who had money and now had to work. i think.

--

some people who talk about you w/out you doing anything to them are just plain jealous or maybe insecure.  but, some people you talk about are just plain kalibak-libak.i think there's justice when i libak people. cuz they're just libak-able.

--

"When you really love something, then it loves you back, in what ever way it has to love."
a separate peace- john knowles

reklamador

my class is soooo quiet when am asking them questions. i miss my old class. haha. day 2. 18 more days to go!


there's not much lately. i just want a vacay.


"that's the great thing," isabel solemnly pondered, "that's the supreme good fortune: 
to be in a better position for appreciating people than they are for appreciating you."  

from a portrait of a lady by henry james

in her purse

for the lack of better post. inside my newest fave bag. :)
my 3 year old wallet from shobe
coffee mint pick me up in a tin can- local bacolod brand
my exfuja i.d.
tube of cotton candy lip gloss from bath and body works
usb cable- how it got into the bag-i do not know..
alcohol
cologne- gal version of eternity cuz gelo uses the guy version
small bottle of lotion- vanille
lip stick- pink fairy
cheeks blusher
lip balm- burt's bees- menthol :)
my one year old brush from cee
mobile phone from gelo
my old old compact that is still alive
coin purse from shobe still

saturday night live

photos with nazel gracey janice and gelo
sorrento and ice
abril dose, 2008

balay balay

now our apartment looks like this:

9

Of course God is the sun. Everyone in the life before was cranky, I think, because they just wanted to know.

"After I Was Thrown in the River and Before I Drowned," from How We Are Hungry by Dave Eggers.

wave 9.. one month..

edits

from scrapblog.

bwahahahahaha, ako gyapon ang queen

took me half a day to figure out proxies! technology can kill me.

peculiar station

pardon the fonts. proxy's all fckd up again.
i saw gaisano main with gelo for the first time in my almost 2 years here. amazing ginamus kabarato sa mga gal stuff.. i wanna go shopping, cheap shopping..
went out with the girls from the old account (nazelmarie, rodelliegrace and janicelim:) and with gelo as useless. (or gelo and i invited ourselves to their all gals night-out) beef taco salad/lychee margarita/salpicao.. i miss pepe's.. gelo and i are seriously broke.. i wonder why we braved thru sat nyt-->going out without moolah..
we have tons of photos.. (did not get to upload at gelo's place, weekends are always the best time for power interuption..)
checked the new club ice adjacent to westown hotel.. some stupid freaking panget na insik na bata idiot touched my tush as we made our way out of the bar; gelo being the maoy that he is when drunk wanted to beat him. am like, i did not see dut guy, let it go, sha lang man di katulog..ahgahd.. sobrang loser..
i hadn't had that much fun with chikkahan in a long whilst.. i've been working the whole time since i've gone to training dept. and life had been always at home and doing chores.. and if we went out, the first stop would always be groceries.. it's a refreshing break to be able to talk to a great number of girls as compared to always hanging around waiting for gelo and his guy buddies to finish their booze..
we had been planning to make it to church on weekends.. my choice of church.. kaso, we get tangled up with either staying up late on saturday nights, or sleeping til lunch time on sundays, we'd wind up not making it to church.. am grateful he wanted to try church..
today, we were at his rents' place for lunch.. it's been raining almost the whole day..
am with him at work tonight..hehehehe.. to quote him "kadako sining place for one person.." referring to our bedroom cuz i told him am scared of being left alone at home..

&
&
&
i've a newfound fondness of the boyfy yesterday when i asked if someone left a baby in front of our gate would he love the baby like his own even if the enano looks bolingit.. his reply was: oo eh, gift bala na.. alangan naman indi..
drats, he is such a boy!
i've a new class tomorrow night. already made the class' name tags with the lil airplane logo.. i wanted to make cheat sheets for myself so dut when the clients would be here they'd see some improvements. ahgahd, i loathe it when i try soooo hard.. i've always been okay with being mediocre..
--
i kinda thought that the company would be okay since our new leader is a Christian, and a product of the company from day one.. at times, when you think that it's worth-while to whine about things that lacked structure(just the way i am), i realised that it's better to start structure within yourself- try to have that organized feel within you- that little start-up spark might be the push/ inspiration for something greater.. soooo, i guess, instead of always complaining, i might start praying for our site director, and the company that feeds almost a thousand young people in this city.. that its leader may help bring about change to it.
----->
"Our individuality is all, all, that we have. There are those who barter it for security, those who repress it for what they believe is the betterment of the whole society, but blessed in the twinkle of the morning star is the one who nurtures it and rides it, in grace and love and wit, from peculiar station to peculiar station along life's bittersweet route."
Jitterbug Perfume by Tom Robbins

i wanted a twin like this.. :)

two-gether

am guilty of not being able to spend lunches with gelo
i've been preoccupied by work and got wrapped up in catching up with girlfriends lately that i forget 2am is lunch time.

we're a team. i should always remember this. even if some things would change and at times feelings would waver/falter, we're still a team.

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhayers. i wish i could say more.

american airlines,maawa kayo saken.

hayers, sooooooooo true.

and the women break
vases against the walls
and the men drink too
much
and nobody finds the
one
but keep
looking
crawling in and out
of beds.
flesh covers
the bone and the
flesh searches
for more than
flesh.

Charles Bukowski

-
-
-
if i hadn't moved accounts, i would not have this much trouble!

dear anvi

i should see you!

this. is fleeting.

finally, i love wut i am doing for a living.
it's fulfilling to be able to share what you know lalo na when you are confident that you are teaching the right things. and if ever you understood other things differently you can actually pull back and make adjustments.

am happy i am in training.

bwahahaha. and ops floor people are not my bosses. fyi lang sa mga sugoero and sugoera.

--
i've tons of tiny bruises allover.i hate this time of the month!
gelo and i finally made up. i hate it when i am yelling and crying just to get my point across. mayo nalang he heard me. best thing i said today: alangan naman i don't say things,to think daw mag-asawa nata cuz gapractice-practice natah.
hehehe. now that i think of it, i will not wonder why people don't take me seriously when i am angry.
--
floor walking all the way. go wave4. hehehe.

married segments

friday:dinner with gelo and family at imay's.. went out with the training class.. had drinks at nutty g and mo2.
saturday:groceries. ampucha, rice is 44php a kilo! naunsa na pinas?




sunday: home. laundry.being oc.




monday: lunch out with gelo at pizza hut- ihatethatplace! bidli kaau ila pizza. sobrang tarantula(taranta) shift with my class. they took calls. am proud of them even if some things are a mess.




tuesday shift: better calls for my agents. i won't listen to chismis talaga. i know my own class and know how they feel about me and how i teach.



**it's just sad that some people are stupid. like some people in this city. puno lang provincial garbages. kawawa naman.



"I begin to wonder if you ever wanted to marry me."

"I did. I did. But that was before the breeches, before this. I'm not sure anymore that you are the woman I loved."

Hands on hips, Rosalinde declared, "I see. You fell in love with silliness and skirts-- with skim milk --and choke on the cream."



-Hazard, by Jo Beverly

half baked.

class ended today. and a week from now, i will take on the next class. i told them that they had created a not soooo desirable impression towards two of their managers cuz they were cheating blatantly. i somehow feel accountable for not giving a hundred percent effort towards stopping cheating on tests and exams because i know that they are seasoned agents and they are also adults. and adults should know the drill. hopefully, with their skills and their new learnings from training they might step up and disprove that they are a bunch of rotten apples cuz they're actually an okay bunch if they only stopped being too negative about being transferred to the account.

am somehow wrapped up in negativity lately. it's about time that i smell the roses. hehe.
it's the weekend. i've no other plans. i kinda wanted to go out with the class but, i'd rather not.

today at graduation we had lechon- huuuuuge one w/c was gone in about 2 minutes. then the class gave me a framed thingy with our photos and scribbles of my favorite expressions that i used in class. one sup gave me a bag and a white blouse.

all's good. today, i learned that if you work for men, they'll still find loopholes in what you do, so you would rather work for God's delight this way men cannot look you down. ( i hope i made sense).. something quoted from Corinthians, methinks.

Have a good one!

raeny

lost

a stain in my immaculate white shirt

i don't have a life anymore, since i am usually talking about my classes and the people from work. and most of them around me now aren't adorable people. and i've just about had it with the people who feels like they're my bosses. ats if. when it rains, it's four. dikaya.

and yeah, i've had it with stains on my denim skirt/seersucker dress/white tank tops/mellow yellow blouse. everyday, i come home with white board and scented markers stains. ahateit.

am pmsing big time. good thing payday na tomorrow. i don't want anything new, i don't have a shopping list. it's just that i wanted a massage and i had been putting it off since i got here. and it's always a good if not better feeling to have some money in the bank and then days after payday, you'd have to wait for the next payday na naman.

one day soon, when i come to understand this city i will leave. right about now, am not ready to leave yet.

in class: at times i mumble my words/ construct the most incorrect/incomprehensive sentences unknown to mankind. i catch myself laughing when i do that. but, really i could not write/speak in straight english like how i can back in kindy or gradeschool. kakahiya big time. and yeah, grammar check nalang gyud ko dapat always. but, then again other people in this city or this company must not try checking my grammar cuz i know dut i am waaaaaaaay better than them.

i hate guys. ugly guys who feel like they have the right to boss you around.
incident kanina: gipaypay ko paduol sa hayup na manager ug sultian, i need your tracker updated. am like, are you talking to me?  haaaaaaayers, some people here feels like they're the owner of this company. to thunk noone i repeat noone is indispensible in any company.


last day tomorrow. then the week after next, am gonna be on another class. hayers.

i miss angelo.

beggary.

i thought i'd have the freaking graveyard shift this way me and gelo would eventually have same sched. pero tanginang malas namens and am still stuck in the morning shift, w/c i loathe cuz i am alone at that huuuuuuuuuge, empty apartment at night. ahate my next wave's sched. but, i am relieved that it'll be my last 2 days with wave 4. then they'll be transitioned to ops floor. again my mantra is: they're adults, i do not need to reprimand them..if they did not listen or paid attention during class, they will be taking calls 7.5 hours a day the rest of their TP life. soooo that's more painful than getting an IR.

but, today, i've like 10 IRs issued, it's all written warning, that means none of these people can apply for another post within the next 3 months. and hopefully that'll teach them something, if they don't get it, well sorry sila, they'll be taking calls.

dah.

anyway, i wish gelo could get the mc job for his account. he deserves it cuz he looks better being mc rather than being an agent. at least naa na pinakapogi na mc in TP. cuz some dili jud angay sa job plus bolingiton pod kaau hitsura. murag preho sa mga lahing managers and supervisors, bulingon ug bulingiton mananina, pati english bolingit sad.

anyway, ayoko nang maging beggar. i want the night shift cuz of the night differentials. dammit.

i hate bolingits.

"Your heart is like a great river after a long spell of rain, full to the banks. All signposts that once stood on the ground are gone, inundated and carried away by that rush of water. And still the rain beats down on the surface of the river. Every time you see a flood like that on the news you tell yourself: That's it. That's my heart."

Kafka on the Shore - by Haruki Murakami

asdf

oh gawd, i don't know if my trainees are deaf or plain dumb!

all in a day's work

am supposed to rant about someone i awfully thought had "power" ruined his character and back in the day he isn't even the best agent there is when taking calls. i will not.

basta now, i would look at work as work. i did not choose to work here to make friends anyway.

nonetheless, class had been a breeze today even if we had to transfer rooms last minute and even if we can see pipes from the ceiling and even if not all agents can log-in to their PCs.

it is well. soooooo, some people shouldn't be too nitwit to "thunk" that they are the most credible trainers cuz all they do is BS.

and i have at least 8 more months to go before my training bond would end. afterwards, it'll be thank you very much..