how to deal.

i hate having to wake up to the MIL knocking at our front door asking if i am feeling all right. sometimes, i just want to yell leave me alone. my own mum doesn't really wake me up you know and it's fine. (; i sometimes wish we don't share the porch so that when i feel like sulking and commiting suicide, i'd have the privacy to do so. these, amongst other things are the pinpricks.

i'm also hurting for cookie. i honestly wish this fugly, control freak negra would stop picking on her. when in fact she is the one who is not totally blameless. when you think about it, this is just a small community. our livelihood is an integral part of our lives, but- it isn't our entire life. though it's cliche i know that when God closes the door of your comfort zone, He wishes you to continue moving, striving, doesn't want you to be laxed and complacent. sometimes, floor to ceiling windows will suit you better. (: our whole lives cannot be relied upon a job. true, you'll be hard up when you lose it, but who isn't used to the barebones? i am not scared.

andddddddddd,i have younger sisters who can be overbearing most times, with opinions, with feelings. but, i love them. i can't stay hurt. now, i realized that i should just shut up when they speak of disgust, of their own perspective. it's theirs, not mine. bickering won't help me become a better mom to my child. and yeah, charity begins at home.

and j, we're all right. we're dealing. with each other's lack and with each other's strengths. we're on the family way. simply put, we're into relational adjustments and relying on each other. and sorting it all out.

turning 29 in 2 weeks' time. loveleh.

Christianity is a tough call. a long walk. sometimes, you wanna sit by the shoulders of the road and eat butong butong. at this time, i wanna do just that.