turning a new leaf

 

 

i’d still get shivers when I listen to rent’s seasons of love. It aptly worded how a year would pass a person’s life and how it can be quantified through how you loved… ganda. Tsakto.

 

i reckon that every 20 something around the world whatever skin color they have on, they go thru the same struggle that any other 20 plus plus would go thru. That they have issues with their folks, have the oddest way of expressing affection to their siblings or to the person they’re seeing constantly-struggling to be understood as they try to understand the other as well, feeling better about things thru booze or a shot of vodka, turning to faith or their Jesus, relying on friends to validate that they are all right, dealing with work and work being a routine, or slowing things down thru cups of coffee, trying to get rid of laziness thru a shot of espresso, going thru a period of instant noodles and soda crackers,accepting issues with self image and self consciousness, trying to be fit and healthy even if after a good round of ahem, cardio, one forgets to stretch first and would endup wit leg pains, discovering what good things a city could offer, memorizing street names so they don’t get lost, learning where to get good sushi, where to get good cheap wine and wine glasses,knowing a local language and keeping it at heart, learning how to go about mass transit, meeting shiney people, sharing his and her story and making Saturday night shorter, going thru getting an apartment that would seem livable, and having the realizations of the things one could only wish for during college, when one’s protected with the walls of the university//

 

it slowly sunk in that I am actually living/ that I can be anywhere I wanna be if only I am courageous enuf to say GO// that I can stay because I chose to stay and I am am not left without an option//  jacel once told me about nearing med school, that as your dreams would materialized you can never be or say you are totally prepared for it//

 

at times I wonder how I can be the person for others that the ateneo tried to inculcate in us// when am overly consumed by the trivial things that would not really matter much 3 years from now// I always wanted to choose kind words over rash and harsh opinions that I would normally utter// I would always want the world to be a lil better// and it’s awishing too lofty and in shades of grand and purple, however, at the end of the day, I know it’s a lil bit better knowing that there are at least a couple of individuals who gave me their hearts and opted to stay.

 

 

 

 

 

♥

Rae Anne