| Mood: |  loved |
| Music: | real world-matchbox 20 |
nagtrisikel ako. creepy how the striker smiled. it's like my guards are up lately, after that horror flick last weekend i'm always weirded out by sooo many things, even the antique chairs splayed on the garahe are scaring my wits out....
i feel like i did not have enuf sleep during the weekend...when i logged out eds kidnapped me and that had cee and nikki thinking i ummm secretly went out on a date, i became dora the explorer, or i was too tired to wait for them to log out that i went home and sleep.... i went food and alcohol(them, not moi) bingeing with the ppl from OPS support, ang hirap kumain at uminom ng nag-eenglish. hehehe. as useless when it's freeloading andun ako. haha. i had the boss buy me double espresso(see, am hooked!), then while everyone had starters i already am on the main course, when everyone had the full meal, i was polishing my dessert. hehehe.... namemorize ko na food at pepe's that i already know that the starters could not be without gambas, that one should try anything with pesto, and well, their dessert is odd, yung panacotta with banana did weird me out.... then us, minus the boss RLo,all caught, wag kang lilingon....yeah, at first it was like some cheap budget film until we ended up screaming...wut ate me was the thought of having to sleep alone saturday night and am like promise na, by monday iam not gonna do petiks....and what was crazy was the fact that my lunchtime is at 3am, tas i've noone to have lunch with cuz ppl are on calls, tas in the movie, the witching hour would be at 3am. leche. when i got home there was at least 10msgs on my phone. and pinaka-abnormal was....i need medicine....i thought he was seriously needing medicine. i replied. he didn't text back....i spaced out the whole saturday night...when nikki and cee and everyone else had a saturday night story to tell....
wukits, ilearned something being with the gals from support tho, that i snap out of the insecure mode cuz the world is fair daw, balibaliktarin ko man ang world, God made it like so, but, it is still fair in sooo many odd ways...and that i start finding security within me and not from others....with that said....i guess they made sense....
yipee, i made it to church, cee came by my place after i got done with laundry, then we took the cab to her iba na ang mayor ng baranggay church, then we had lunch there cuz it's their 12th thanksgiving. imiss my own church, i miss mbc, and the thought of kantata during the holidays and teaching the kids from the outreach program...i miss having to spend friday night fellowship with the young ppl, having long discussions of discipleship with ate sundee, struggling to understand philosopy and our Jesus with shasha,and the long walk home with ian...that's how iloved before, and i could not think i could ever reclaim that girl who took the baby Christian walk....but, am glad cee is around. and ppl like jeremy. constant reminders of having to keep the faith...and am glad there's lechon...haha.
then we had coffee at bob's cafe-lacson, while cee was trying to troubleshoot connecting to wifi i asked cris to call,imiss the guy who loves my sister and will marry her. haha. imiss shobe. ;( but the choco-mint berry ice cream from FIC made me happier. wukits, lemme tell you they've this delicatessen carrying everything from cheese, olive oil, mint sauce, even altoids. ang funny. but, walk out ako when my allergen named tim came by...
itold vincent sinasapot ako, that he can wake me up when it's about dinner time, hehehe, cee, him et moi had dinner at imay's, we were supposed to go to carlos, but, the wait time there was too long, and they only had steak daw...(plus the fact that mamatay ako sa lungkot if we ate there) so we settled for lutong bahay. the place served decent sinigang na pis, oysters, and stuffed squid-well si vincent lang ang kumain ng marami nun...tas bob's uli cuz si allergen tim would catch up, we had tea(oh chammomile na walang lasa pero paborito parin kse nga walang lasa) while cee was tinkering with her laptop...and am wondering how many times would i PMS in amonth...that i did another version of walk out, this time the more krung krung kinda walk out, buti nalang i did not have to take the cab, vinchent offered to drive me to mcdo and wait for nikki. and cee was in an ahay-achee-sorry mode hehehe, kawawa, she was supposed to crash in my pad, tas i asked her to go home cuz tinotoyo ako muchos. ewan ko ba ba't ako inis na inis kay tim as a person.... then nikki had her as useless mcfloat fix, she amazed vinch cuz she was in her shingles mode cuz she could neither speak ilonggo or tagalog and she could only speak english and chinese and cebuano, and vinch was like may ganun palang tao...sbe ko, oo si nikki....hehehe
he then drove us to sorrento, na malungkot, asked him to come back for us, he took us to eastblock and left...so two gals were left with a pitcher of strawberry margaritas, a box of marlboro red, and too many mishaps to share.... ayun, i ended up with this hagulhol OA na crayola mode, and nikki was like raeny, ang swerte nya na kaya, ilang beses ka nang naiyak(-awww bisaya diay), undangi na na....then we walked towards starmart east, had vodka cruiser and mac, tas we decided to just go home, nikki was cee's replacement nalang, she decided to sleep over...we didn't exactly sleep cuz we ended up doing more chikkas that red and cee ended up being there tas we had breaksfast at jollibee... and so i realized it's monday na pala.
hay.
over the course of my conversation with nikki, she asked, as if you do not have a relationship with God, and choking my tears am like if my relationship with Him is not at all rocky nikki, i would not ever look for another person to fill the void, i would not cling on anyone to tell me am wukits....
sighs i have yet to fix it. i will.
i even told her that during the year i asked God for a life-altering experience, He gave me piayaland. in so many ways my life was altered that my heart could not contain the blessings;that i see them in a different light when i fact, i should've been grateful cuz i always always had answered prayers. tas i told her next time when i pray i better put up a checklist so that i would be more specific. Ü
fifay and i were exchanging sms last saturday, itold her i had to live up to being greta, she said nooo raen, we better be ruffa. haha. gawd, i miss her. :)
and am not ever going to pick up a cigarette and ever touching alcohol. new year's resolution. this early.....
;)
♥
Raenyberry
"I believe in Christianity
just as I believe that the
sun has risen, not only because
I see it...but because by it
I see everything else" C.S Lewis
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fallen rain. (: